Tips

Last week, I went out with some friends to a restaurant/bar for Trivia night. We always order food and drinks - a pitcher right away. Normally, we get the same waitress every week. She knows us, we know her, she does a good job, and in turn we tip her very well.

It was a different story last week. Our waitress was NOT GOOD. Since I used to wait tables, I had some sympathy for her, but she never redeemed herself. Let's count the ways she messed up:

1. She didn't ask us if we wanted anything to drink when she sat us.

2. When she came back, after 10 minutes, we ordered a pitcher then asked for menus.

3. Ten minutes later (see a trend?) she came back with the pitcher but NO menus.

4. Ten minutes later she came back with the menus.

5. When she came back, we already finished our pitcher, and had gotten a new one from the bar...that's how long she was gone. We ordered.

6. One of us ordered wings and when he asked if he could have sauce on the side, she said "Bleu cheese or ranch?" He corrected her and described "sauce" like mild, bbq, or hot. Then she said, "We have salsa." I had to cover my face, because I was laughing so hard.

7. She came back with our food, and the sauce guy didn't get anything with his wings...no sauce, no bleu cheese, nothing. Just wings. He asked where his sauce was. She forgot.

8. Later, she asked if any of us needed a box. One of us did.

9. She brought us our bill.

10. She collected our bill, we asked for our box since she forgot it.

When she brought us our bill, mine came to $7.90, and since she did a wonderfully awful job, I decided to tip her $.10 and make it an even 8 bucks. What I didn't expect was that she would take our bill before she brought us our "forgotten" box. When she returned with the box, she obviously saw that I only left her a dime, she didn't even look at us. She was peeved.

Honestly, she did a really bad job. I don't feel bad for only leaving her a tiny tip. Her total tip was probably $8.00 total, so she really had nothing to complain about.

I must say that when we left the restaurant we had to pass her and she did not look happy. This was a tough lesson for her. Maybe she will do a better job next time. Hopefully, we won't get her tonight. One word - awkward.

Food=Bad. Well, for me at least

Wondering why I haven't blogged since last week? Not wondering? I'm going to tell you anyway.

I was lucky enough to get food poisoning. I felt like crap for three days! Was I going to die...maybe. I could barely move. Probably because I was so frickin' weak. Which is because I couldn't eat anything, because I couldn't keep anything down!! I moaned and groaned on the couch hoping that my outbursts of pain would make me feel better. It only made me feel the tiniest bit better.

On Monday, I only inhabited my bedroom, bathroom, and living room. I almost forgot what my kitchen looked like. When Tuesday came around, I finally was able to put some food in my stomach - a piece of toast, about a cup of noodle soup, and later some mashed potatoes.

I even went to the doctor since my back and stomach hurt. When I say hurt, what I truly mean is "felt like Jason Voorhees was trying to stab me in the abdomen with a dull machete he pulled from a barn." (AMC has been having a Friday the 13th marathon) Watch it. Or are you scared? Don't be. It's very predictable and cheesy. I think the new Friday the 13th (maybe it's a couple or three years old) is pretty scary though, but watch the classics too. Wow, I'm way off track here. Anyway...

The doctor found nothing, which was slightly discouraging because at the time I wanted relief. I wanted something to free me from this pain. Well, a little heat on my back for about 2 hours Tuesday night really relaxed everything. You see, this pain I felt was a combination of me laying around all day on the couch and bed, not eating enough, and the typical food poisoning cramps.

Today though, I feel so much better. I'm not back to my regular eating habits, but it will happen.

Oh, and to my parents: Thank you for taking care of me. I promise to try my hardest to take care of you guys when you come down with some sort of illness. It's going to be hard, but I'll try. (I don't do well around others who are sick...it scares me) Ha!

Wednesday Musings: Take Thirteen (8 Questions)

Jill from Life After College tagged me in a questionnaire where I answer 8 questions. Since I was lucky enough to be tagged, I figured I would let it take my Wednesday Musings' place.

1. Female-Thongs or boyshorts?
This is a hard one. On one hand, thongthongthongthongthongthong. On the other hand, boyshorts are so cute and comfortable. So both. I'm wearing both right now...I mean, I pick BOTH!! Yes, I pick both, and I wear them both, but not at the same time...that would be weird.

2. What's your favorite kind of ice-cream?
Anything with peanut butter in it :) But at Culver's (custard instead of ice cream) I pick chocolate custard with Andes Mints...my nephew introduced me to it. He has good taste.

3. What's your most embarrassing moment?
Uhhh, gosh I can't think of any particular moment. I have stupid moments that are slightly embarrassing, but not omigod-I-CAN'T-live-another-day-embarrassing moments. I have a pretty good humor about these things, so I brush embarrassing moments off with a smile. Like today, I brushed off about three moments with my smile.

4. What age was your first kiss?
I was in 7th or 8th grade. I kissed a boy who played the trumpet. We were in one of the band practice rooms during recess. If we had a "pass" we could stay in from recess and practice our instrument. (I swear I wasn't a band geek) I played the trumpet too, so this boy and I practiced and then I gave him a kiss on the cheek. Hahaha, then I ran out and told my friend who was practicing in another room. I didn't abide by the "kiss and don't tell" rule. I was a rebel. A rebel who played the trumpet.

5. Do you prefer cats, dogs, or neither?
Cats, but I have a sister-in-law who is allergic. So if I ever get a pet, I would love to get a small dog for an apartment, but then when I get my own house someday I will have an outside cat ;) My whole life is now planned out.

6. Do you have any tattoos?
Yes. I look like Kat Von D. I'm all inked up ;) Haha, not.

7. What do you hope has changed in this world by 3010?
I hope we have cars like in the movie I, Robot where they drive themselves. Why am I saying "I hope..." I won't be around. Ooooh, but I hope that people will be studying my works in English class or watching my films and saying: "That Kinsey - she must have been pretty awesome back in the day."

8. What's your favorite book?
Hmmmm, I really enjoy all the Chelsea Handler books, but to be literary (as I studied the subject)...The Handmaid's Tale is really good. Margaret Atwood is brilliant! But my favorite, favorite, favorite book takes me back to the 5th grade - Hatchet by Gary Paulsen. Makes me want to get lost in the woods and eat berries and throw up from eating too many berries. What an adventure.

My 111th Post

One, one, one.

Guess where I'm blogging from???

Paris, France...you guessed it! Hahaha, NO. I wish. I'm blogging from my couch. A couch in my house. Upstairs too. Not downstairs. Not in my cold basement. Not plugged in at all.

We have wireless :)

So I'm beginning again. I will now blog everyday (well like about 4 or 5 times a week). Who's excited???

I bet you would be more excited if you were in Paris, France. Right?? I don't know why I'm on this Paris kick.

But I am eating Cracker Jacks. Question: When did the prizes start sucking? Seriously, I want Cracker Jack rings, little figurines, stuff like that. This is what I got. A "Can You Guess Who I Grow Up To Be?" paper picture puzzle.

Here's what it looks like...
So apparently, David Duchovny grows up to Abe Lincoln.

Well, Abe, thank you for your early years with "The X-Files." I never would of thought that you went from Mulder to Honest Abe. I guess The Truth was Out There.

I just call her Fergie

Today I was baking cookies and my mom came in the kitchen. This is how our conversation went:

Mom: "Did you hear the latest about Fergie? Princess Fergie...whatever she's being called."

Kinsey: "I just call her Fergie."

Mom: "Not the singer Fergie."

Both of us: "HAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Kinsey: (thinking) I feel stupid. "I thought you meant the singer. You mean Wales Fergie or wherever she is from???"

Mom: "England, yeah. She is having people pay to see Prince Andrew for like $10,000.00!"

Kinsey: "That's a pretty good idea."

Mom: "No, Kinsey, that's really bad."

Kinsey: "Oh, haha...I just call her Fergie."

Both of us: (more laughs)

I sort of felt like the dumb girls off the street when Jay Leno does his segment "Jaywalking."

Wednesday Musings: Take Seven

I fell asleep to the Syfy channel last night. The X-Files was on, and I love that show. MULDER!!! SCULLY!!!

A dude called me this morning about furthering my education. Seriously? I'm graduating on Friday and I don't think I'll be furthering my education for awhile. Hello? Freedom!

I'm pretty sure I ate my Erb's and Gerb's sandwich last night with my eyes closed. And I'm pretty sure I ate it all except for one bite which is now wrapped up in the fridge.

I went out for Heather's birthday last night. Which should explain the blind eating.

The "Job Switching" episode of I Love Lucy is on right now. It's probably one of my favorite episodes. That and "Vitameatavegamin."

I used to be able to recite Lucy's Vitameatavegamin commercial word for word when I was younger. "Hello friends. I'm your Vitameatavegamin girl..."

Slams the Door and I never got to finish our doubles tennis match. So it will forever be a tie between us.

I'm going to leave you with a clip from the I Love Lucy "Job Switching" episode. Have a happy Wednesday!

I am making fat people fatter

It's true, it really is, and I want to stop it.

Here's my plan. I think that restaurants should close before 11:00 pm, because people shouldn't be eating after 8:00 pm anyway. It's not healthy.

Since I waitress, I am serving people large pan meat lovers pizza at midnight. I am making them FAT!!!

I need to write to Obama and have him pass a bill or whatever to close restaurants earlier.

We need to join the fight against obesity!!! I don't care if people get the munchies or need drunk food after bar close. We can leave Erbert's and Gerbert's and Jimmy Johns open, because when you eat it you're not compromising your arteries.

As an added bonus...I wouldn't have to work until 1:00 am on Friday and Saturday nights. Which will make me very happy.

You Probably Don't Even Want to Know...

But I'm going to tell you anyway.

Ever since I learned how to text using T9, I've had some texting troubles. Like today for example, I tried to type "tied" and it typed in "thee." In what century does my phone think I'm in where I would use "thee" in everyday texting conversations??? Another one that bothers me is "on" and "no." When I try to write "Heather," my phone interprets her name as "heavier." That's not good.

I think I'm dehydrated. Actually, I know I'm dehydrated. My urine isn't a Country Time Lemonade color like my Nutrition Professor says it's supposed to be. TMI?? You betcha!

Erbert's and Gerbert's think my name is ODENBURGH, KINZ. I spelled it for them too. Come on people.

I refilled my Best Buddy at Kwik Trip yesterday with Diet Dr. Pepper. It didn't have the same effect on me as the Mountain Dew, thank God!!

Slams the Door and her doubles partner played me and my partner in Tennis Class today. We are tied 3 games to 3. Our Set will continue on Thursday. Who will be the winner?? Honestly, I don't even know.

The Library "Hurts So Good"

I don't like the campus library very much. I feel like if I stay too long I'll get sucked in to a library-like-black hole.

People talk too much and loudly! Shhhhhh!!! It's the library...

It's really hot in here too. Yes, I'm in the library right now. The printers go off every 10 seconds and it creates a very warm atmosphere. HOT PAPER!!

The only reason I'm in the library is so I can print off my papers for my English Portfolio. Which is now done. Thank God.

We have to turn in a digital copy too, and I didn't have all my papers on my computer. A few of them were just hard copies. So I had to re-type some of my papers just to save them on a CD. I tell ya, it's not fun to rewrite a paper on Clarissa Dalloway's soul, or lack thereof. It's very drab.

Anyway, I'll be out of this place in ten minutes. Don't get me wrong. I love libraries. I could spend hours in them searching through books. But when I have to complete assignments or read for class...I don't want to be at the library.

When I was in elementary school Library was my favorite class. Well, besides recess and lunch and gym...and music and art. I liked everything :) But Library was my favorite. The Dewey Decimal System and I had an understanding. It was good.

Anyway, if I was on the second or third floor of the campus library it would be much quieter. I'm on the first floor and it cuts students a little more slack. I think they should still talk a little softer though.

I guess I shouldn't be talking. Last semester I was up on the third floor (where you can hear a pin drop) and I cracked open a can of Dr. Pepper then resumed to eat a bag of Doritos. CRUNCH CRUNCH! I almost busted out some John Cougar Mellencamp, but I contained myself.

Wednesday Musings: Take Five

I want to see Date Night so badly! I've known about this movie for about two months now...thanks imdb.com

My one credit Application Letter online class gave me a fright on Monday. I forgot to do my last assignment and take the final quiz on Friday when it was due. As of two days ago I had a total of 40 out of 80 points for my final grade. I freaked out, did my assignment and took the quiz, then quickly emailed my professor.

To think that this stupid one credit class could have held me back from graduating....ugh!

I got an email yesterday from my professor and she said it was alright. YAY! No more worries.

The latest craze seems to be dressing up in nerdy attire with nerdy glasses. I don't like it. If you're trying too hard to look like Steve Urkel, then something is wrong with you. "Did I do that?" Yes, yes you did. Now stop doing that.

I've been craving spicy food all week. My mouth is on FIRE!


I watched Law and Order: CI last night, and I'm sad that Goren and Eames are gone. Did I cry? Ummmm, maybe a little bit. Okay, jeez, I cried through the entire last scene. Then I watched it again at midnight. It was a very good episode!!!

Sometimes I browse random blogs by clicking the "Next Blog" button at the top of my screen, and I somehow got a string of Spanish blogs. I couldn't read them. No Habla Espanol!

I Make Incredible Edible Eggs

I don't want to toot my own horn, but I just made some delicious over-easy eggs!!! I think I found my forte - egg cooking.

I should open up a cafe where all you can eat is eggs, eggs, and more eggs.

Scrambled, over-easy, over-medium, omelet, poached, sunny-side up...you get the idea.

Of course, toast will also be on the menu, because who doesn't eat eggs without toast??

Oh, and I'm a pretty good toaster too!

At my cafe I would also offer cereal and milk, because my milk to cereal ratio is to die for. You can't go wrong with a bowl of Lucky Charms in the morning, noon, or night.

Unfortunately, I'm graduating this May. I know it sounds weird for me to say "unfortunately" and "graduating" in the same sentence, but here's my reasoning: Currently, Winona is in the process of building a Wellness Center with a complete kitchen. They will be teaching students how to prepare meals with hands-on demonstrations.

It couldn't be worse timing...this Wellness Center will be ready to go next school year, and I'll be off in the real world cooking eggs and toasting toast, while pouring milk over Honey Nut Cheerios.

I'm semi-complaining here. Although, I do make mouth-watering eggs and toast, I can only eat them for so long. Maybe I'll sign up for some cooking classes over the summer and expand my so called "skills."